Why do you cry when you are bumped into the undesirable events? Have you ever inquired such things from yourself? Have you ever even tried to scrutinized that, such thoughts have trounced you, your intellect and to an outsized extent to your spirit also.
If you really trust "HIM”, if you are really devoted to “HIM” more than anyone else; then why are you so self-doubting? When you have bestowed everything in “HIS” hands to be full filled; then stop bothering about materialistic things. Let "HIM do "HIS" work. And if still insecurity persists then don't think that something less is coming from "HIS" part, dilemma lies in you only; there is no 100% credence.
"HE" is a big giver. "HE" only knows to give and in return demands zilch. Many a times you feel jealous of others just because they are enjoying more materialistic things than you. You have reflected such a fancy in your mind that they people are more blessed, they are "HIS" favorites and "HE" loves them more than you.
Well, if it was true, then there would be no difference lingering between human beings and the great “GOD”. For "HIM" everyone is at priority and "HE" loves everyone to the fullest.
If you put a half log of wood in the front of the mirror, it reflects the half image. Expecting full image, are your high expectations which always lead you to disappointments. Same is in the case of "GOD". You are giving less and expecting more. Sense of irresponsibility is at your part and you are blaming "HIM". More you give, the more you take.
The more you lay down your arms, the more "HE" engulfs you in "HIM".
That's the rule of the nature.